Well.

Hello, red wine to my right and hello to the three amazing readers who clicked ‘follow’ on my blog today! I don’t know how you found me or why you decided to follow, but I’ve only written one post so far so clearly you just don’t realize how most probably boring/terrible/melodramatic this blog will be. But thanks to you three, I felt inclined to write a little harder today, because I didn’t want to check in here on my first evening starting this blog and not have much to say when I new three people may possibly skim it.

Ha. Who am I kidding. I honestly won’t be hurt if you guys hit ‘unfollow,’ I promise. I really did just start this blog to keep myself on tabs; I don’t expect anyone else to find it interesting. But thank you three so much for taking the time to show interest, if only for today! It gave me motivation, which was nice. I hope the three of you get some awesome, karmic writing motivation yourself in the next week.

So, that out of the way, here’s what I accomplished, writing-wise today: I only played Candy Crush on my phone for like…twenty minutes? And only watched one episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. And only surfed reddit for like 45 minutes. AND THEN I FINALLY SAT DOWN AND WROTE SOME STUFF. FOR LIKE AN HOUR OR SOMETHING.

I’ve been working on a short story, just trying to ease my way back into fiction (it’s been a very, very long time), and it’s been difficult. I’ve been working on this story for about a week now, and I know it’s terrible, but I feel compelled to finish it. Because if I can’t finish a short story, how will I ever work my way up to a novel? It’s grown to about 12 pages, so I don’t know if it’s even considered a short story anymore, but I hope I will finish it tomorrow – or at least by the end of this week (come on, June Get your act together!).

And now for a secret writerly thing I did today: I bought tickets for the upcoming Yallfest (Charleston Young Adult Book Festival) happening in November in…South Carolina. Except I live in California. I don’t even know where South Carolina is on a map.

I haven’t told my husband yet. And here’s the thing – I know (or I believe, I think he would, anyway) he would be supportive if I explained to him that I think it could be a good thing. That I would like to have something really done by then that I could bring with me, because I get the impression you can meet agents at these sort of things and YA is my jam – and he’s shown me so much support, and believes in me. But I don’t know if I believe in myself yet. I feel like I need to prove to myself that I can do this, and so far I haven’t done that, yet.

Since I quit my job at the end of May, I’ve done a lot of internet surfing, a good amount of reading, and a little bit of writing. How can I say this is what I want to do when I’ve hardly done anything yet?

So I have tickets to go to the festival. And I would like to go. But I don’t even want to approach it with my husband yet – not because he wouldn’t support me in it – but because I don’t feel confident in myself yet. I need to prove to myself that I can do this, and buckle down and get. writing.

So, three followers, it was really nice meeting you. But as you can see, I’m kind of a hot, rambling mess here. Unfollow button’s at the top, I get it.

And to me, I say – tomorrow’s a new day. Go get ’em, tiger. Rawr. Cat hissing sounds. Scratch at the air. I totally understand both motivational speaking and the feline species on a deep, deep level.

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