In which I am reminded that I’m not very great at this. Yet.

Word count for the day: 551

I have to be honest: that was all typed in the past hour (okay, hour and a half…I’m a slow writer, and I get distracted easily), because I didn’t want to go to bed feeling like a total failure.

Better than nothing, right?

Also, can I just take a moment here to explore the concept of comparing myself to other writers/bloggers and maybe stating that it’s probably not a great idea? I got into such a funk tonight. I was reading through another blogger’s blog, and the writing was just amazing. And she had so many followers. And she hasn’t even had the blog for a year.

Okay, so I didn’t create this blog for followers, and I don’t expect to ever get that many (pretty sure ‘daily word counts’ aren’t a hot ticket item), and don’t even know how I would feel if I did. But the writing thing?

Well.

Diving into this like I have, especially after so many years of not really writing anything…well, it’s been hard. And it’s been humbling. And I’m starting to realize I may not be a very good writer. I know that sounds egotistical, and it probably is. But since I was a kid I was praised for my writing, all up until I graduated from college. It was the one thing in my life I kind of felt good about for a long while.

It’s okay that I’m not a great writer, that’s all right. But it’s hard when I read someone else’s writing and I really feel it, you know? Like, holy cow. Just, really beautifully written stuff. And then I look at my stuff, all clunky and one dimensional and sad.

But I know I shouldn’t dwell on that. And it takes practice and hard work to get better. I just need to keep trying and I know I can improve. So I’m trying not to dwell on it, because if I do it may stop me from progressing. All I can do is keep trying at this point.

Advertisements

A pittance.

517 words. That’s it. That’s all I got done today. 517 more words towards the novel. That’s a fingernail where I need a whole body.

Why can’t I seem to focus and make real progress?